Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Turning over a new leaf

I hereby acknowledge that sharing music with other people is bad. It robs artists of their due and assists in putting a vibrant industry in jeopardy of losing billions of dollars. From now on, I will endeavour to help the impoverished music industry as follows:

1) I will not download any more albums of popular, copyrighted music, even if I possess the music in my CD collection. Internet bandwidth should not be wasted on the sharing of copyrighted music. The reason will become clear soon enough.

2) I will buy a separate copy of a music CD for each purpose - one for my stereo, one for my car, one for my portable music player and one for my Macbook. Because spending $80 on an album makes much more sense than buying it once and copying it to the various devices I'd like to listen to it on.

3) I will try to sell my CD-ROM burner on eBay. Hopefully I get a good price for it, because only pirates would be interested in buying a CD-ROM burner drive and they are notorious for not wanting to pay for what they get. I have no need for a CD-ROM burner anymore now that I intend to buy all of my music legally, because there are no other legal uses for a CD-ROM burner drive other than to copy music illegally.

4) I will be taking my music play list down from my blog in short order, since allowing my blog readers to listen to music for free is a violation of copyright. I'm sorry if that doesn't allow you to audition anything new in the hopes of discovering new music, but promoting new music is the job of the labels and I leave it to them to continue this task, as they have done so marvellously in the past. Bring on the next Britney Spears!

5) I will be giving lectures to the youth of this country to stop stealing music from the internets. The internets are an unorganized, very inefficient method of distributing music. If it was such a great idea to allow music distribution on the internet, the music industry would be doing it themselves and other industries would be distributing valuable things like information.

6) All music pirates can have my mp3 collection if they want it, before I delete it some time between now and some time in the future. Just contact me and we can arrange for you to come over and copy what I have.

7) From now on, I will be obtaining all of my movies through the illegal downloading of ripped DVDs from the internet, because dude - that's where the action is now. Free movies. Worth much more than free music. Like duh! Music is so last century.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

You realize Karl that there's probably a music executive reading your blog post who is wringing his hands with glee by this announcement.

Karl Plesz said...

Yeah. Too bad it's all a joke.